Until you were gone....

Dear Mum,

I am not sure I have EVER been a good son, but I strongly believe I have NEVER been a bad son. I really hope you agree with me. I may have hurt you in many incident, even up to the last incident of the Zinger Burger Tragedy, but I have never held any grudge at you. After all, you are the only 1 left for me.....until you were gone.

All my life I have always regarded you as the first most important person in my life. Next to probably, only to dad. But you have been there for me and I hope I have been there for you too.

I still remember the nites we spent chit chatting up to 1 - 2 am in the morning everytime I come back. I still remember when you said you wanted to settle down with me in Singapore. I still remember to even talk to my dearrie about how we gonna look after you after our marriage and take you out for a holiday at least once every 2 months. It was still a possibility ...until you were gone.

Now, I'm stranded alone but not dusted. I will carry on to at least fulfil my last promise to you mum. To come up in life and I am at least happy I have shared my planning to you before your demise. I hope you will always bless me and stay with me through thick and thin.

Thanks mum, I will always love you. And no one, will be able to replace you.

I love you and I am sorry.


p/s: Thanks to all friends who have sent their condolence wishes to me, please pray for my mum to Rest In Peace.

Note : Mum have passed away peacefully on the 19th December 2005 at 5.50 pm. Dear God, please take a good care of my mum.

MUM HOSPITALISED!!!!!

At 5.30 am this morning my phone rang. I hardly have anyone calls for me at this hour, so sleepily I got hold the phone and saw my sisters number flashing on the screen. I definitely know something is wrong just don't know what it is. Anticipatingly I answered, my sister then broke the news to me.

"Mum had a stroke early morning, we just rushed her to the Selayang General Hospital. " said my sister.

"WHAT!??", I said

"Don't worry I hope nothing is serious. We tried to get her to the Pusat Kesihatan Kecil here, but the damn doctors said he can't attend now and had to wait till 8.00 AM. Then we tried to get her to Tanjung Karang General Hospital also the same case. No doctors till 8.00 AM. So we rushed her to Selayang GH"

"How is she?"

"Dunno yet, she couldn't move her right hand or her right leg"

This piece of news really made me feel worried. I wasn't ready, what can I do. Can I go now, will she be ok. I don't know. I was worried and prayed as much as I can.

It's this week where I need to be flooded with meetings. I care to them second to my mum of course but I just wanted to find out the situation first. I frenetically called my bro-in-law, and my eldest bro who were at the hospital already. Then I called my second bro informed him. He immediately rushed to the hospital and call me to say mum is ok. Not that bad, just a mild stroke. Scanning and everything seems to be ok. That came as a relief to me.

Then I was still trying to arrange to go back home today, when my sister called. She said, mum is fine so don't have to rush today. Take your time. She said she needed someone after a day or two, more than today. If everyone takes leave now, who's going to look after her in later days. IT does makes sense and so I agreed to be there Thursday.

I informed my boss about it. I told her I'm leaving Thursday right after the meeting. She actually asked me to leave now if I need to then come back for the meeting if it cant be cancelled. I told her, I might as well leave on Thursday and spend the weekend at home. She was nice to even offer me some cash but I told it's ok. I think I can manage now and will ask for her help when I need it.

So guys, please pray for my mum. Hopefully she will recover soon.

The ones that matters

Through out our education from Primary 1 to Secondary 5 and for some Secondary 6, College and University and/or even further,we would have came across hundreds of teachers trying to educate and guide us. Many would have forgotten these personnel, bar some. Today I'm going to dedicate this article to those who made the marks in my life as a teacher and beyond, and whom I regard as the path-breaker or turning-point initiators of my life.

All through my life, I think I have been only an above average stude. Not excellent.My primary school started in SRK Jalan Kelab Sukan, Slim River, Perak. I studied up to standard 3 there.Never really bothered to make any mark or what-so-ever as I have no benchmarks to be compared with to judge my performance.I was the only one in my family to be enrolled into a malay medium while the rest were from tamil medium schools. But in case you think they speak malay like how it is potrayed in some of the stupid malay/tamil dramas in local TV, then you are terribly wrong my fren.As they speak better malay than I do, mine being fairly good that's all.

Anyway, from Pri 1 to Pri 6 there are only 2 teachers I regard as the best things to happen in my life.

1) Mrs. Susan - English - Pri 5, 6 - Sek. Keb. Rantau Panjang
She is so fond of me, she even fetches me to school and back. We are from the same neighbourhood anyway.She makes sure I get everything right. 90 - 95 marks is not good for her. She will hunt me down everytime I fail to do well.

2) Mr. Nordin - mathematics - pri 4, 5 and 6 - Sek. Keb. Rantau Panjang
This is the one teacher everyone will piss in their pants at his seight. He is so damn strict that I think if he were to maintain his style now, he would end up in jail for student abuse. He wacks, kicks, pinches, canes, humiliates, call us names, slap us and god knows wat other sort of punishment he can come up with. I have personnaly met his famous Flying-Duster punishment so many time. The worst thing, our parents of those days simply supports him! But I really think it works, just too well. If not for his slapping, I would have never memorised my Sifir (whats that in English? Pu1Pu3..help!). And he even goes over board in calling us names like "Keling", tease our fathers name and stuff. For one reason or the other reason he is fond of me. Because of my association with him, I always get extra rice for nasi lemak from my canteen caretaker. She always says "Ni cikgu Nordin punye assistant ni. Bagi nasi lebih ok!" ("This is Mr Nordin's assistant, give him more rice ok").And by that I would have earned more wrath from my friends.

Then I was into my secondary school Sek. Men. Rantau Panjang, I'm not seeing Cikgu Nordin anymore, and so I slacked off a lot! Came Sec 2 year, and came in Mr.Chandra. He is one of the best Maths teachers in the district. And the one that you better watch your language and behaviour. My maths was always compared to my elder brother Sasi (who is a Syafiq Aiman now) who is an expert. Once i couldn't get my Teorem Pithagoras right and I had to crawl over the drain around my school block. Everyone saw me doing it! And guess what, I was in my PREFECTS UNIFORM! What an embarassment. But for his "I HECK CARE WHO THE HELL ARE YOU" attitude towards me, I started to pick up my Maths again!

Then I met Cikgu Fahrul, who don't even teach me anything in class but my personal coach in school. Believe or not if not for him, I would have been the typical indian guy. He is the one who basically banned me from using Tamil in school, even with my indian friends. And so, there you go I earned their wrath again.They always say I am just being "KAKI BODEK" (loosely translated as an act of BUTTERING someone). But who cares, my Malay improved tremendously.

Cikgu Nassir is the other teacher who don't even teach me anything but cared for me like no other.He is the one teacher I would share anything and everything.

Mr.Mariappan, the other indian teacher in my life to make a different. For one or the other reasons I always end up with the fiercest teachers around. Mr.Mariappan is our Dicipline teacher, and he has a style too. If he calls you towards him, and IF he pockets his wrist watch, then you better make sure you can stand his slappings! Coz, calling you and pocketing his wrist watch means SLAPPING IN PROGRESS!. He also never tought me anything specifically in school. He just like the way I asked for his permission to meet one of the students in his class and got attached to me. I just knocked on his door (he was teaching English for Sec 5 students then) and said "Good Morning Sir. Sir, can I please meet XXXX for a few minutes Sir". He looked at me and said, repeat that please and louder, and so I did. And thats how he got attached to me. I really dunno why? Even till today.

Mrs. Kholijah - biology - Sek Men Keb Raja Muda Musa(SMKRMM)
She is such a nice person and always complaint to my dad for whatever I did (breaking the huge glass of the skeleton showcase) and didn't (my homeworks most of the time.

Mrs. Revathy - English, Physics - SMKRMM
It's almost the same as Mrs. Kholijah I really think they had a startegy against me.

Mrs. Azman - Addtional Maths - SMKRMM
My class teacher, and another one in alliance of Mrs.Kholijah, and Mrs.Revathy!

But if not for these individuals (where I have missed quite a few of them here, not forgotten but spared for greater review in future!) I wouldn't have been where I am now. Not extremely successful yet, but I am getting there! With God's grace and blessings of those around me.

Thank You Ustad Abdul Shukor, Cikgu Murni, Cikgu Anwar, Mr.Teh, Cikgu Zul, Bonda (our Pricipal who likes to be address this way, until I have forgotten her name!), Cikgu Azman, Cikgu Mahali, Cikgu Hamzah, Cikgu Rosli, Cikgu Devi, Cikgu Saraswathy, Cikgu Badariah (sorry for all the nonsense in Chemistry lab), Cikgu Arbaiyah, Cikgu Maimunnah (for that great trip to Police Station! Her husband is the Police Inspector there), Mrs Chandra(got nothing to do with Mr. Chandra) and not forgetting Cikgu Halimi.

THANKS TO ALL OF YOU! MAY GOD BLESS ALL OF YOU.

Zinger Burger Tragedy (Being sensitive??!)

This real incident simply opened my eyes to the idea of being Sensitive. My dearrie always complain that I am not being a sensitive guy. I dont really know how on earth am I going to be sensitive to someone I'm so used to. I just cant emote my feelings of being sensitive just because that is how a good companion does. I know, from the way I explain "sensitivity" here I may be heading towards the pesimistic sensitivity but hey, thats what you need to understand in order not to emote that feeling in ur partner.

I'm a vegetarian, many of you (I have only 2 - 3 readers anyway) know. By being vegetarian itselfs, i will be down with rashes, puss, lip-swelling and itchiness on my back every now and then due to some mysterious food consumption. So far I have failed to identify the agent of these allergies in my body, not sure if lunar position have anything to do with it or what. But the point is I AM SENSITIVE, physically of course. My feelings? I don't know? Am I? Am I not? G-O-K (God only knows). But still I'm not sensitive enough, probably I should be like Brandon Fraser in Bedazzled who cries over a sunset may be.

Anyway, the ZBT (Zinger Burger Tragedy) is also related to sensitivity which involves my mum. Last week, when I was down in KL I brought my mum for a medical consultation to a clinic. The doc diagnosed more than 1 problems for my mum, as usual. So he advised my mum to cut down on spicy and sour foods, teas, coffees and other gastrict related foods. So we paid, and left the clinic with BAGS of medications.

On the way back, my sis requested me to get KFC meal for the boys and so I stopped by KFC. My mum saw the Zinger and asked me if she can have it, well I said ok why not (although doc just advised 20 minutes ago). After getting what we need, she was happily munched away the burger on the journey back and spontaneously opened the windscreen and throwed the wrapper out! Now, I'm a guy totally against this! I hate people doing this, its so irresponsible. So I actually, harshly told her off. I said "Good, you throw things as you wish and later complain the road and the residential area is not clean!". After that there was no conversation for about 10 minutes of ride, then my mum asked "Are you angry?" and I said "Yea, but its ok. Please don't do that again."

So we went back home, and my sis enquired about the docs advice and stuff. I without being sensitive enough said "Doc asked amma not to eat spicy stuffs, but she had Zinger Burger on the way back!". We all just laughed it off. No one took it seriously, and so we thought!

2 days later, I called my mum from Singapore and enquired about her health. She said "I'm fine", shorter and in a different tone that I'm used to. So I asked her "Is there any problem" and she said "Nothing".

Now, when a woman/female says "NOTHING" that simply means there is a Star-Wars-Saga like story behind it. Oppose to when guys/male say "NOTHING", it really means THERE IS NOTHING!.

After further questioning, my mum said "How could you people laugh at me for asking for Zinger? I had vomitted the burger right after that! I won't ask you anything anymore in my life!"

And there I was, on the other end of the conversation speechless. How would you feel when your mum says that to you! Mind you people, I hardly have any arguements with anyone in my family. So a small one, seems like a major issue for me. I almost cried over it for 2 days.

Dear mum, I'm sorry. I won't do that again. I love you ok.

With that incident I realised, not only my dearrie wants me to be SENSITIVE, even my mum needs it from me. So much for being insensitive!

So guys, please be sensitive (AND I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT YOUR SKIN OR MINE!)

Went Around The World and I'm Back!

pu1pu3 and gusti adipati

pu1pu3's friend who tried very hard to take our photo! Thanks mate!


Well, i was away for a long long time and just came back 2 days back.
Was a good trip turned sour due to some incidents.

Anyway, I was away in KL for a business trip last week (15th /Nov) and had to go for another meeting with a client on 25th Nov. The meeting was with this company X where popgummer works now. It's an irony since I got my first job through PopGummers persistent and perseverance...and that was 7 years ago. and Now, we are in the same meeting room talking about another possible project t work together. If at all it happens, it will be great.

Meet a couple of sweet people on this second trip (from 24th to 29th)...
First I met, Popgummers' wife Pu1Pu3 in the same hotel that I stayed....what a coincidence.
Then met her friend.....i'm really sorry I couldn't remember her name. Then the other sweetest person I met was in thix company X. Their manager Ms.Noora. Maan, is she sweet? YES! Is she too sweet to be true? YES YES OOOH YES!

I have never met someone sooooo willing to go out of the way just for some people you know out of a project meeting! Well, right after the meeting in Bangi (where this training center was practically in a place where no cabs drive by unless anyone intended to go there, and forget about walking out coz god knows how far it is!) we had to call a cab to fetch us back to hotel. And I decided to give Ms.Noora a call and ask for any cab company's telephone number, and this was the conversation....over the phone

Me : Hi, Ms.Noora, I really need ur help. Can you get me a cab number so that I can call one?
Noora : Where are you now?
Me : At the entrance.
Noora : Ok you wait.....(and hung up the phone)
Me : Ok, and hung up too
My Colleague : What??!!!
Me : She ask me to wait?
Colleague : For what?
Me : I dunno! Just waitlah. Probably she call a cab for us.
Colleague : Ooh ok.

After 10 minutes, there was a red proton stopped in front of us, in it, Ms.Noora smilingly....

"Come in, I will drop you somewhere easier for you to get a cab"

And guess what that "somewhere" was 10 minutes drive away!!!!!

Wow....how sweet she is!

my aunty and myself

my aunty & sisters. My fav-sis is the 2nd from right


then I spent my time in my non-existent sister turned favourite sister's house! She was my cousin sister actually, but turned out to be my favourite sister after our brief meeting at my grandma's funeral. For some reason, we just stuck to each other and like each others company.

Then I had the Monday to be spent with my GF (it was her bday) but due to my commitment the whole day was cut short to only couple of hours as I had to work (WHILE ON LEAVE) until 4.30 PM!

The whole trip went hay wire but I guess, I learned something! IF you buy your mum a Zinger burger, don't tell you sister about it !!!!!!! (will explain why on my next post!)

This photo was taken in 1985. Guess who?????!!!!